It’s exciting to be blogging again after being on hiatus for a few months. Being on internship has required me to start learning an entirely new language as well as a new job. Learning not only who to ask questions of, but what to ask at all has been a delightful challenge for me. There aren’t as many people actively training to become ordained clergy anymore. It’s an unusual calling in our culture.
I find myself in a beautiful space of twilight in an old, ancient world as well as in the dawn of a as-yet-unknown new one. Straddling such momentous space is humbling. Maybe in the midst of it all, words aren’t always necessary to articulate the experience. Maybe time simply needs to be given to focus on the happening of it all.
That being said, acknowledging that being on hiatus from Reluctant Mysticism has helped me time wise, it also tossed all of my already precariously juggled writing balls all over the ground. I learned that taking a break from actual doing also can mean a total break in focus. Putting any kind of meaningful words together became like trying to keep dry in the ocean using an umbrella. Some authentic intention was there, but the application of it all was seriously flawed.
So once the busy demands of Christmas were over, I was able to spend a bit of time reflecting on where I wanted the blog to go this year. Choosing a word for the year is a popular practice now for people — meditating on one word that reveals different aspects of itself, ourselves, or God throughout the coming 365 days. I mulled over the idea for a while, but one word didn’t seem to quite fit the vision here in this space.
Apparently I took a longer time to mull things over than I thought (& to find all my writing balls scattered around the various venues of my busy life), as January has melted away and February starts next week. Is it too on-the-nose to declare January’s theme “Word” to be all of this one post that includes all the others words for all the other months?
As I lean into this new way of being, I’m slowly gathering myself together and finding that focus once more. I love the process of writing sermons — delving into exegesis and finding what might be good news for us today; I love drawing youth together to focus on social justice and spirituality; I love visiting folks in the hospital. But I do miss wordcraft.
Here’s to a return to focus and carving out intentional time to develop that focus.